


I Don't Really Love You Anymore

by avespika



Category: Doctor Who, Doctor Who & Related Fandoms, Doctor Who (2005)
Genre: Alternate Universe, F/M, Fluff, Romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-08
Updated: 2016-07-08
Packaged: 2018-07-22 06:10:55
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,718
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7423135
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/avespika/pseuds/avespika
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>The Doctor can't stop accidentally saying what he means.</p>
            </blockquote>





	I Don't Really Love You Anymore

**Author's Note:**

> Human best friends here, though with some minor reworking I probably could have avoided making this an AU. Oh well, here we go!

The Doctor met Clara at Vastra and Jenny’s annual end of term party. Considering their differences in age and temperament they were unlikely friends but found they enjoyed keeping one another occupied throughout the summer with walks through the park, trips to the symphony, rainy days reading at the coffee shop, and nights watching movies at Clara’s flat. When classes resumed at Clara’s school and the Doctor’s university they remained close, spending weekends planning lessons and marking papers at the Doctor’s house or taking in a play together. A full year passed and they hardly went two days without meeting. When Clara needed a friend to share the boredom of family events the Doctor would groan and roll his eyes but would escort her nonetheless. She in turn accompanied him to retirement parties, visiting scholars' lectures, and the other dull events from academia. 

Then Clara went and got a boyfriend, or at least it was headed in that direction. Mr. Pink taught P.E., or maths, or something at Clara and Jenny’s school. It didn’t matter what he taught. What did matter is Clara had been on three dates with him, over three consecutive weekends, and the Doctor found himself regulated to a single standing Wednesday evening dinner date with his best friend.

One such Wednesday he’d arrived at her flat to find her apologetic, saying she didn’t really have enough time for an evening out, but he could stay and chat while she did some work around the house if he wanted to. That’s how the Doctor found himself seated on her bed, sulking while she tore through her closet looking for something to wear to the wedding of yet another cousin. A wedding she hadn’t even asked him to accompany her to, a sure sign things were becoming serious with Mr. PE Pink.

“What about this one,” she asked him, holding up a sleeveless red dress.

“You wore that to Simone’s hen night,” he replied, rolling his eyes.

She picked up a short light purple gown. “This?”

“Your uncle’s birthday party, back in August.”

“What about the long green one with the stripes?”

“Your cousin Michael’s graduation, and you hate how uncomfortable the shoes that go with it are anyway.”

She held up another.

“First off, that’s black Clara, bit unkind of you even if you don’t approve of Teresa’s fiancé, don’t you think? Second, you wore that to your great aunt’s funeral, just three weeks ago.”

“This is hopeless.”

“So buy something. Or don’t go. Or borrow one of Mr. Pink’s suits, I’m sure you’ll look dashing.”

“Very funny Doctor. But I haven’t got time to shop and my cousins always chatter about what I'm wearing. They haven’t got anything better to talk about.” Her dark eyes were large in her pale face, her annoyance at the situation clear in the way she frowned at him. It broke his heart to see her even just a bit unhappy so he gave in and decided to help.

“Fine, I’ll tell you what to do. The really vibrant blue one, you never wear that. You had it on the night we met, in Vastra’s garden. It looked great against all the flowers then and it will do so now, I’m sure. Wear that to the wedding.”

A smile crept across her face, replacing any trace of a frown. “I’d forgotten all about that one. Thanks Doctor.”

“Anytime,” he said. Then, quietly, as though chastising himself- “to think I used to fancy you.”

“Sorry, what was that?”

The Doctor froze- she'd heard. After a long moment he choked out “nothing Clara, nothing at all.”

“No, you said something. Did you say you used to fancy me?”

His ears flushed red and he became very interested in the pattern on her duvet.

“Oh my god, you did! That explains why you remember what I was wearing that first night at Vastra and Jenny’s!” She noticed his expression and sat down next to him on the bed. “It’s ok, don’t go all silent over it. It isn’t uncommon to fancy a new friend early on, Doctor. I thought you were a bit of a looker myself when we first met.”

He felt the heavy weight of regret enter his chest. 

Clara continued talking at him. “So you used to fancy me. When did it become ‘used to?’ I’m curious what I do to put a man off, considering I’m sort of seeing someone now. Don’t want to make the same mistake twice.” She winked at him.

Great, now she wanted his help with PE. He’d really dug himself in. He needed to think of a convincing moment he might have stopped fancying Clara Oswald. Instead, his mind landed on the opposite, the moment his infatuation had turned to love. Before he could stop himself he was recounting the moment. “That night we had the picnic on the beach, with the meteor shower.”

“I remember that night fondly, what was wrong about it?”

Nothing, it had been the perfect night, her eyes reflecting the stars and the waves gently rolling toward the shore.  So he lied. “You did a thing with your eyes. I knew I couldn’t fancy you then.”

“A thing with my eyes? Aren’t you fickle, going off someone because of a ‘thing’ she did with her eyes.”

“Can we please just stop talking about this?”

Clara stood. “Fine, I’ll drop it. Besides, now that I’ve solved my wardrobe problem why don’t we have that dinner we had planned?”

“I love you… I mean, I’d love _to_.”

Clara stopped and turned toward him. “Say that again?”  
  
“I’d love to. Go to dinner. Let’s just go to dinner.”

“Doctor, I get the feeling there’s something you aren’t telling me.”

That I fell in love with you and missed my chance because I’m a coward? Hardly want to tell you that. “Can’t think of anything.” He avoided her eyes.

“You know I can always tell when you’re lying. Like the moment you took a bite of that pear tart I made and said it was lovely.”

“I was trying to spare your feelings, Clara. What were you even thinking, pears.”

“Don’t try to change the subject.”

“Right boss.”

“What’s gotten into you?” She sat down again, searchlight eyes turned toward him. He looked away.

“I’m fine, really, Clara-”

“No, hang on. You remember what I wore the night we met. You remember what I wore to all my family events since we met, maybe because you were there for half of them. And you sat right there, on my bed, while I decided what to wear to all of the rest of them.”

“So?” he said defensively, eyes fixed decidedly upward this time, counting the cracks on Clara Oswald’s ceiling.

“So, I bet you can’t name a single thing you were wearing any of those nights.”

He searched his mind and found he had no memories of his own clothing. “Uh, trousers and shirts, I’d expect. I don’t own any dresses, Clara, otherwise I’d have loaned you one for this wedding, obviously, considering we’re about the same age and size, though you are shorter, and also rounder, so not the same size at all, actually.”

“Doctor,” she said, a note of warning in her voice.

She was always so damned persistent. Oh well, if this was going to be the end of their friendship he might as well go for broke. He sighed heavily and raised his head, meeting her eyes at last. “Clara, I didn’t stop fancying you." He paused, took a deep breath. "I fell in love with you. And then you ask that PE teacher, instead of me, to accompany you to this wedding, and you want me to help you dress for it. And since I’ve missed my chance, if I ever had one-”

Clara had closed the gap between them and pressed her lips to his. His heart soared as she kissed him and reached yet further heights as she opened her mouth under his once he’d regained enough composure to finally kiss her back.

When they finally parted she spoke again. “You daft man, why didn’t you say something?”

“I tried, a dozen times at least! That first night, when you asked for my number so we could plan a hike, and then at the symphony when you borrowed my jacket. On the beach with the meteors, in my living room when you were marking those dreadful King Lear essays, at Evette’s retirement gala, at Simone’s wedding which would have been hideously inappropriate. Earlier tonight even, when you answered the door!”

“We’ve got to work on your communication skills.”

“ _My_ communication skills! But you haven’t even told me- Clara, I’m no good at this. I’m not your boyfriend. What about your boyfriend?”

“You really are an idiot. I’ve been in love with you for months, I just thought you’d didn’t do that sort of thing. I even asked Vastra and Jenny, they said they’d never known you to date! And Danny and I have only been out three times, there’s hardly any breaking up to do.”

Clara Oswald loved him back. He’d never felt such happiness. Of course instead of telling her that he blurted out “but you’ve asked him to Teresa’s wedding!”

“No I haven’t- when did I ever say I had! If you’d pay attention to something other than what I’m wearing and your inability to tell me how you feel you’d have heard me mention Teresa didn’t give me a ‘plus one’ on my invitation. In fact, at her hen night she actually mentioned that since I won’t admit to dating you she wasn’t going to invite me to bring you.”

“And what did you say to that?”

“I told the truth- that you aren’t my boyfriend, that I was trying to get over your romantic indifference toward me by dating someone else, and that it was going dreadfully.”

“Oh Clara, why didn’t we have this conversation a year ago?”

“Because apparently we are absolutely clueless. So, Doctor, what do you say?”

He leaned toward her and cupped her face. “I say Teresa had better reconsider her wedding date policy because I am your boyfriend, I do love you, and I would hate to miss out on you in that blue dress.”

 

**Author's Note:**

> Inspired by The Magnetic Fields' song with the same title. Considering a short series of unrelated fluffy stories inspired by songs on 69 Love Songs because there's plenty of Doctor/Clara material there in the half-sarcastic, half-sincere music. 
> 
> For anyone curious, start here: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oodKrSy0zMo


End file.
